Brighter than ever

Brighter than ever
Nearer than I could hope for
Your loveliness dear

Just a little haiku-ish ditty, written quickly before dashing off to life, with Lena on my mind.

Loving a deceased person has it's challenges. Obviously, they aren't "here" physically. Some of their things are here. We keep them in special places, pretty boxes, and urns. We carry the memory of their personality, their warmth, and spirit on our heart. It's never enough. And we've got to accept that despite how it sucks not having the choice. 

The majority of my daughter's belongings are in plastic bins, stacked in a closet, safely out of emotional sight. Crash prevention. For what am I saving these items when they only bring forth pain, I do not know. Punishing myself for not dying first? Hoping they'll remind me of better times although that is seldom my reaction? 

She is still here after all. 

Loving a deceased person has its blessings. Just recently, when feeling depressed from a lapse in self-care, I napped in the middle of the day. Lena, all grown up and lovely as ever, visited my dream and spoke aloud reintroducing me to a woman we'd known but hadn't seen in years. Lena seemed neither happy nor sad, just perfectly lovely. Maybe it was actually me experiencing a happy-sad balance, recognizing how lovely to see her after all this time. 

And brighter than ever. 


blog post, lifeisaprettyword.com

 

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Monica Sword

Monica Sword is an aspiring author and artist living a deeply heartfelt life. Following the early death of three family members, including her daughter, she struggled to balance home and work life. Once she discovered how to apply her conscientious and high-achieving personality to honor her passions, be mindful of her emotional reactions and focus on self-care, she developed a creative mindset that produces her most meaningful life work. On her website, lifeisaprettyword.com, Monica inspires and encourages others to honor their heart and soul in mindful ways.